We all have good days, days when we feel like we are flying in spaceships towards the cosmic joy, we have sad days, days that are just empty & days that seem like the worst has doomed upon us. For someone the “worst” might be a breakup with their lover, a quarrel with their family or beloved friend, failing an exam, not getting the job they dreamed of or a failure or setback which diminished all forms of hope and faith in goodness & the Almighty, a death or a loss that is impossible to recover.
Life is like a bell shaped cyclic curve. At a point in time, things get pretty stagnant and dull. Then comes the upside phase, the phase wherein you need to sweat every ounce of energy within you, struggle and work under the most impossible conditions. You might feel like giving up then, but my dear friend ! Remember, this is the upward slope and even while driving, the upward slope consumes most of your energy. Once you persist through all the tough times, comes the golden period. When you get rewarded sweet fruits of your hard work and when success kisses your feet. How much we wish life was a flat smooth plateau when we arrive at this juncture. Alas ! All the happiness is not much long-lived. After peaks come troughs. After warm sunshine, comes heavy rains and bitter winters. It is often that at this phase, we feel as if the world beneath our feet has been swept away. Like we’ve fallen down a cliff into an ocean. An ocean of loss, an ocean of disappointment and failure.
Once you have tasted success and experienced love and happiness in the truest form; loss, misery and defeat are extremely difficult to digest. Also, during the ‘struggle’ phase, if we do not achieve our desired goals after much efforts for a long period of time, the ship of our hope and faith sinks in.
So, what is the takeaway ? What to do in difficult times ? How to endure ? How to persist ? How not to lose hope ?
The worst thought that can cross one’s mind is “GIVING UP”. Giving up on the efforts, hopes and life itself – ‘Suicide’. When you feel that life is simply wasted and everything you’ve done is vain. When we wish to numb the pain forever. A lot of times in my own life, I have felt like giving up. Wanted to simply not exist. Wished for all the pain and sufferings to be washed away like the dust being cleansed with the first shower of rains.
So what is my secret ? Why am I still alive, healthy & happy ? How did I cope up ? Why did I not give up ?
The key is to express and let your heart feel what it wants to feel. Imagine water being kept for days in the same glass. What happens ? It becomes stale and over a period of time algae starts breeding in the stagnant water. So is it with life. Let the flow of emotions run in your heart and mind and you will never encounter any clots. Try to suppress your feelings to numb the pain for a while; and it cumulates to such an extent that one fine day, the balloon will blast !
Express what you feel. Communicate your problems, griefs, issues, setbacks, disappointments, loss, to a loved one. Someone who can listen to you empathetically and lend you their shoulder in your tough times. A friend who would wipe away your tears before they flow from your eyes. But, if at some grave milestone, you feel all alone; and think there is no one you can share your life’s emptiness with, do something to unveil the negative energies and emotions. Write to your diary, write letters to God, sing, dance, hit the gym with some workout, play sports or indulge in some art. Do something to channelise your pain and busy your mind with some activity.
What if none of the above works for me ? What if I have decided to give up ?
For a moment, just think about the people who love you and the ones you love.
“The person who completes suicide, dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand … Why?”
“Because if you kill yourself, you’re also going to kill the people who love you.”
Death is not the end of pain and suffering. It only ends the hope of things getting better. Remember, when the night is the darkest; sunshine is only hours away.
Today on September 10th, on ‘World Suicide Prevention Day’, to every person reading this, I want to give you a big warm hug and tell you:
I am thankful to the people who have been my pillars of strength and support during my tough times, who have lent me hope and courage and who believed in me, when I couldn’t. Thank you for your love so unconditional. ❤
PS: This is my 100th post on WP and something really close to my heart.