Major Milestone

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Some people might call you a mistake, some – a lesson. A few name you as my Karma. I call you my milestone. My major milestone. Someone who divided time in my life as before and after you – just like we have Before Christ (BC) & After Christ (AC); why can’t we have time as Before You & After You ?

Before I met you, I was naive and foolish and stupid and a big believer in fairy tales. Like a powerful being shaking a little tree, you came in my life and shook my little world. You put me on the path to become a mature adult from a young and naive adolescent. You challenged my beliefs and my world with your mature ideas. I still haven’t come to the terms as to decide who was right and who being the wrong one. As to who being the lover and who being the sinner.

You still remain a mystery to me – now may be even bigger and more enticing. You came, challenged and changed my world and you left. How can you, so easily leave ? That is still a puzzle to me beyond my ability to comprehend. How could you be so heartless, or was it just me this coldness was meant for ?

I still remember your fragrance, the way you smiled when I was just being the cheeky me, the way you’d say a “hello” on the phone. The way I would playfully hit you time and again. The way you could read my eyes and mind without any effort and the way you’d say sorry a million times – till I’d soften up. Where did it all vanish, I wonder ? The easy going conversations and the endless talks we always had ?

Some people might tag you selfish or as my mistake while I was blinded in love – yes, I do believe very strongly I was in love. What I wonder is that did it ever touch you ? Or did I fail so miserably ? What about the letters I wrote to you and the secrets I shared – only with you ? What about the endless smiles we shared and the laughter sessions which would leave me complaining that now you need to stop as it hurts my belly and makes my eyes water with tears of joy ! What about the understanding and the bond we shared ? When with just my ‘hi’ over a text message you’d gauge my sulky mood ?

I think I ought to have listened much more closely to you when you claimed that I was merely one amongst many. When you left me with doubts and questions. When every time I took it upon myself to excuse the inexcusable.

Still, I think of you and a smile draws upon my lips. I will always, always remember you. With a strange fondness and a unique nostalgia. I will remember you with a fondness, a child has for his favorite ice cream. A teenager has for his favorite game. Every detail about you, every tiny thing you shared with me, will be forever etched in my my heart in permanent ink. A lot of things fade away with time. Wounds heal and scars disappear. Numbness melts away and spring finds its way.  What will never fade is the memories of us – I have to cherish. The lessons of love and life you taught me. It does make me sad that I had to pass by you – leaving you long behind in a journey I am to take; but there is a unique happiness to know that you were at some point, a part of my journey.

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I am content with having you just as a milestone – a major milestone in my life; well honestly – may be I am not. But who cares, right ? I only wish you’d care a bit about how I felt. Lastly, I just have one last thing to ask you – how could you make me different and just leave ? You knew I wished you in my life forever as a friend, guide and as my reflection. Then WHY did you JUST LEAVE ?

– Yours Forever,
*YouKnowWho*

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60 thoughts on “Major Milestone

  1. Oh my! Another shooting star of a post! Maybe that’s what it was you got to experience “For Awhile”? I have often shared the same questions you have raised here but under similar but different circumstances. Perhaps you will stumble upon my writing about them?

    I have always felt that we should leave those we share with on Life’s journey better off in all the ways we can before time and circumstances cause “A Parting”. And hopefully, some have done the same for us. I think your post here is a great tribute to one who did that for you. Parting is always difficult and often unwanted and not understood. Read the reblog of Chis’ “Gone” on my blog as one of the most perfect descriptions of that feeling.

    Really loved your lines – “It does make me sad that I had to pass by you – leaving you long behind in a journey I am to take; but there is a unique happiness to know that you were at some point, a part of my journey.(and my heart added these lines that I think I heard your heart saying) – and Mine For Awhile.

    Your post here lit up way too many memories to re-examine without reading it a few more times. Thank you for that gift and motivation!

    Bellissimo, My Dear, Bellissimo
    Chuck

    Like

  2. Major milestone indeed!
    That’s the best analogy I have seen of an ended relationship.
    It is never easy to just move on as if it never happened but that’s not the essence.
    People come into our lives to enable us discover ourselves better.
    Sadly, not every relationship ends as we desire but if truly we extract the values from each, we’ll be more beautiful in the next.
    The best is yet to come and you’ll be better fit for it.
    Lovely post, Himali!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Charmers have that way of doing that to you. They live completely in the moment. And they might actually believe what they say. Their energy is so strong. But they lose interest too fast. Maybe the lesson we can learn from them is to live in the moment.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. SMiLes mY FriEnd Himali
    for i am raised by a Mother
    By Act that Love is Forever
    and Unconditional NoW as i often
    DancE and SinG too but not all are
    raised with that/tHis FeeLinG and SenSE
    my Dear friEnd too.. for it is
    often for others that others
    are more
    like
    objects
    than FeeLinG HuMaNs
    but Never the Less A TrUE
    ChaLLenGe iN LiGHt iS
    never LeT LoVE
    Die in one’S
    own eYes
    no matter
    what tide and
    wave of life comes
    next low or high my friend..
    Milestones A tHeMe of LIFe i much
    greater appreciate than goals for when
    goals are met emptiness often follows where
    when A Journey in colors of life is appreciated
    now for what now iS.. dARk through LiGht below
    and beyond all that is now is forever as milestones
    truly just to cherish along the way.. life is for learning
    in clouds and sun and storms and fires and yes lately
    earthquakes and floods and even Hurricane Winds where
    i live my friEnd and as far as milestones go and somewhat
    crosses which are just as important in life for as lovers and even
    friends sometimes go as crosses and joy too and yes milestones
    of life too.. 8000 miles/48 Months of Public Dance i completed yesterday
    iN a TALE end storm of Half A Marathon Dance on a SunDay so breezy
    and cooler from Irma too
    at my
    back
    my friend
    instead of headwinds
    of cross.. it’s good to get
    it out and i suppose more than
    anything for me Hell is at my back
    and Heaven is in my feet and NoW my
    hands they just dance and sing and never
    quit as milestones are in every word too with
    mY Dear friEnd Himali from India and her ‘workplace’ too..:)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Lady Himali, Namaste πŸ™‚

    You sing beautifully with melancholy my Turtle Dove, harmonic on the harp of unrequited love πŸ™‚

    There is a Star watching over Rosewood Himali,
    ‘Fear not My Lady! For your gallant Knight will see,
    No hurt stirs the precious heart of his Himalayan Queen.’

    Namaste πŸ™‚

    DN
    ~*~

    May I leave a little song spinning?

    Namaste πŸ™‚

    DN

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ain’t my English Knight in shining armor the best !?

      ” There is a Star watching over Rosewood Himali,
      β€˜Fear not My Lady! For your gallant Knight will see,
      No hurt stirs the precious heart of his Himalayan Queen.’ ”

      You make my heart melt and bring so many smiles. Thanks a million for the beautiful song as well. Himalayan girl is happy as a lark πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      • My Lady, My Queen, My Red Ruby Dream, Namaste πŸ™‚

        ‘You make my heart melt and bring so many smiles.’
        ‘Dimples as well, my cute wily wiles.’
        ‘Tis the face of Venus as you see me styled.”
        ‘My Knight in a Castle in a Forest in Wales’
        ~
        Himalayan girl is happy as a Larkspur!
        Her song a seed sown in a raven-haired Dark Star!
        Her melody a joy ‘Rocking The Kasbah!”
        Her tune a catalyst melting my Feldspar!
        ~*~

        Sweet dreams Ice Queen. God Bless.

        Namaste πŸ™‚

        DN

        Here for your ear an iconic tune…one to get your foot tapping Sha la la la la la la la la la la dee dah! πŸ˜€

        Nos da, breuddwydion melys (sweet dreams)

        DN

        Liked by 1 person

          • Greetings my Lady HImali, Namaste πŸ™‚

            English Knight and Enchanter, turned 21 more than once!
            But still his heart is ever-green, is poetry edged with Romance,
            For a Poet is he in shining armour, his quill, his sword, his fragrant amour,
            His inky nib flowing a river, his plume a flutter, his feather a quiver!
            O Himali, what Magic you gift to me, how your Love keeps lifting me!
            Higher and higher, and higher still, beyond all sense or sense of will!
            To land upon your blossomed cloud, be lulled behind your blushing shroud
            Shimmering ruby red, the colours of a Goddess it’s said, one who Loves
            With a Love pouring never-ending, in a Heart Ascending for all Eternity,
            Legend remembers the name of Her Grace, I Love her, My Lady Rosewood Himali.

            ~*~

            Thank you for being the wind beneath my wings πŸ™‚

            God Bless. Namaste πŸ™‚

            DN

            Like

            • …Before I dip the feather tip and ink a line for thee:
              Privately before publishing, in The Diary of Rosewood Himali,
              Before the clock strikes midnight, before dreams seduce your light
              I had to add one final line, and whisper to my Lady, “I Love you. Sleep tight.”

              ~*~

              Sweet dreams Himali.

              God Bless. Namaste ❀

              DN

              Like

  6. A heartbreak I’m sure is hard, but it is really refreshing to see one take the positives out of something that can be thoroughly negative. Never regret anything. It brought you happiness at the time and it did teach you many life lessons. I wish you all the best in the future πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Dear Himali, I am sorry for your heartbreak. It is even worse when there are so many expectations, dreams, and plans which all of a sudden get shattered and without really understanding how it all happened we are sitting within the ruins of our dreams. But there is one thing about life we must never forget: Nothing happens for the worst! Perhaps you don’t want to hear it right now or you refuse to believe it but as soon as you are ready to leave this behind you will understand why it was necessary to go through this.
    The disappointment and hurt made you develop something inside of you – a new insight which makes you grow. Also, it may be necessary to prepare you for the real bliss which you might not notice otherwise. I don’t only say it just so. I say this by experience. I was at that point when I put all my future into one person. I thought this is it finally until I found myself at the same place where you are today and once I was ready to move on (because I also realized how unhealthy the relationship was) I noticed the blessing which was there all the time but I couldn’t see it because I was so focused on looking back.
    You have a natural ability to see the good in situations and go from there. This will help you to see and be through it faster than others, stronger than before. Take your time, dear friend. Grief but know that behind the cloud the sun is already shining and waiting for you to appear. Much love to you, Himali πŸ’–

    Liked by 3 people

  8. I’m sorry that you’re feeling pain right now, Himali. It seems to be the way of life for each of us to learn this way. One day, someone worthy of you will fall in love with you and you will be grateful for each other.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. You hopefully grew from the experience. You are now more aware of superficial emotions. You are now more aware that your feelings are not necessarily matched by others. You are now aware that you have much to learn about the idiosyncrasies of relationships.

    How could he make your life different and then just leave? Because you allowed him to change you, and he decided to move on. You have two reasons to celebrate your being:
    1. You have grown from having that milestone in your life.
    2. Be thankful that his “true colors” did not show much further down the road.

    Celebrate yourself Himali………. and move forward with this additional experience as part of your guide! Have a wonderful day and smile at everybody (it keeps them wondering what you’re smiling about!). πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

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