18th Nov., 2018
I chose the best rather than the ‘better’ solution – a run by the seaside to calm down my nerves and help me think clearly (plus you get to build some endurance as a bonus 😛 )
Running was something which helped me to distract myself, the loud music that plays on my earphones with the pain to be endured physically and mentally to push the boundaries, makes it quite a great way to unwind. The aim for me is to go home so tired that as soon as I hit the bed, I’d be dead asleep and have a good deep sleep, as opposed to light sleep (which I track on my smartwatch). I was almost nearing my 25 min stretch of running when I got a friend’s call to catch up that evening, which I had to politely decline. A few minutes later, I get one more call. To my sheer disbelief, it was my best friend. Somehow my friend managed to seize some time to head out for a walk (same pinch on the timings) to hear me out. Almost panting, I answered the call and we had an hour-long conversation which was filled with laughter as well as some intense Q&As on my goals and life. I was bewildered to find that, my friend also held the same point of view as my brother on my dilemma but I was also presented with some food for thought to think about and some points which resonated with my value system to contradict the decision which I felt was right.
I came home reaching 22K step mark on my smartwatch, made myself a green and red smoothie for dinner which I could just finish up half and still I couldn’t find a way to calm down my nerves. I decided that I needed to go for a round #2 walk – this time a calm one and pray at the Temple and Gurudwara close by. I took the long route to reach the temple (the one which passed by the sea), on my way sat down for a bit by the water and heard a prayer on my phone. I prayed for a bit at the places of workship and sat down in calmness praying to God to help me make the right choice which was intended towards the highest good of all. I resigned from solving my problem and left it to the will and wish of God.
I came home to throbbing legs which were as a result of walking almost 28K in a single day. I fell asleep as soon as I hit the bed.
One good thing about resigning yourself from finding a solution to your problems and invoking guidance from the higher power is that you feel so much at ease. It is as if a mountain has been lifted off your shoulders. I woke up the next morning, a bit lighter than last evening which was so chaotic. I slept well, thanks to the exhaustion of last evening.